We mean well. Our intentions are honorable. We want to remember not to forget.
Busy work schedules. Doctor appointments. Vacations. Bills to pay. Our good intentions are soon dashed.
That fall day marked the first anniversary of my brother Jeff’s death. It was a day I wanted to forget, but my heartache denied me that blessing. Everyone in my life seemed to have moved on. Friends. Teachers. Deans. I just wanted one person to remember. Someone. Please. Remember.
As evening approached, I resigned myself to the painful reality that no one remembered. They had moved on. Jeff had been forgotten.
Then I saw it — an envelope in my dorm mailbox. Returning to my room, I read the words of one of Jeff’s friends. Forty-four years later, I don’t remember the exact words, but I will never forget being wrapped in the warm realization that someone had remembered not to forget.
Go with me to that amazing text in Psalm 56:8 NLT — “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” It comes as no surprise that our Good Father God remembers. While that is Good News — may I carefully suggest that it is not enough. Scandal, you say? Hear me out.
Galatians 6:2 NLT says it best — “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” God needs us to wrap our arms of love around those who are hurt. A phone call. A coffee. A simple note. A hug. Anything to let them know you remembered not to forget. A simple gesture to recognize the value of their loss — the depth of their pain.
There’s another incredible reminder in Ecclesiastes 4:10 NLT — “If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.”
As I write these words, my community is wrestling with senseless loss. And I suspect that in your world, there is loss, heartache, and grief, too. Look around. Find those that have fallen. Make sure they are not alone — next week, a month from now, a year from now — maybe more.
Wrap them in the warm reality that someone remembered not to forget.